Whenever I would watch a movie, I would have to watch it two more times to actually remember anything about it. So, yup, I'm not the movie junkie. But I'm a social media freak, so anything that has something to do with the mobile and digital scheme of things, that excites me. That is why when the Davao Bloggers Society got an invitation to the Media Launch of iflix here in Davao City, I had to give it a go.

The best thing about it is that you get all of these abilities at only Php120 per month for unlimited access with NO ADS.

Sherwin Dela Cruz, Country Manager for iflix Philippines, commented: “We are committed to bringing the best in local, regional, and international entertainment to as many devices and homes as possible. With an outstanding selection of first-run exclusives, award-winning titles, and full-box sets of iconic series, iflix is radically changing the entertainment landscape. Our local consumer remains top priority, and key cities like Davao are important drivers to strengthen our presence locally and propel growth. I can’t wait for more Filipinos to discover our world-class service.”

And world class it is! Because with over 160 studio and distributor partnerships all over the world, iflix offers subscribers the largest selection of iconic, critically acclaimed TV series and fan-favorite films both internationally and locally available in the region

It's awesome! Here's a glimpse of what happened at the event:

With iflix, I don't have to worry about forgetting the details of a movie because iflix brings movies [and series] to our fingertips that we can get several reruns of. And oh, by the way, new subscribers get a complimentary 30-day trial. All there is to do is to go to www.iflix.com to register.

I am a wreck!

I tried thinking of a euphemism to make you guys imagine me better than what I believe or better than what I actually am. I decided I can't do that because I really am a wreck.

I am those plates you broke because you were unwilling to do the dishes. I am the shards of a glass that fell off your grip because you were being dishonest. For moms, I am the mess your kids have made. Better yet, I am your babies' little piece of sh*t.

An article I didn't really read said on its title that it is unhealthy to call yourself ugly. I'm guessing ugly can be translatable to anything bad we can call ourselves. Albeit the article was left unread, I believed the title. We should not allow ourselves to think of ourselves as somebody we're not or somebody lesser than who we honestly are.

Yes, I know what you're thinking. If I believed the article, I would not have been calling myself a wreck. Why am I doing exactly what it tells us not to do, then? The answer is simple. It's because I am a wreck. Unsatisfactory, right?

Well, if you grew up being made to feel that way, it's hard to help it. Of course, I can say, 'I grew up being made to feel this way so you can't blame me,' but I'm not saying that 'coz I don't play the blame game any longer. It was really just hard to help it. Slowly, one desperate and painstaking step at a time, I chose to be who I am now. Growing up being made to feel that way, and the absence of emotional support system, or the lack thereof are just some of the factors. The main reason I am who I am now is because this is what I allowed. They say that teenagers are highly inclined to choosing the worse things for themselves but each time I take a little glance over several people I know, I see that they had all these sort of problems at home which if I compared were far worse than what I've actually gone through, yet they're all doing a good job. You might find that as oversimplification but if we adjudge their lives using societal eyes, you'd agree that they all seem to have gotten their sh*ts together. So, even if it was normal for teenagers to struggle through this stage in their lives, something remains inside a teenager that would light his way out of the dark tunnel. I don't know what that something is but rest assured, that's what I didn't have. Or wrong, I may have had it all along, but it was something I have been missing the entire time. Perhaps, I wasn't the teenager in this story; I was the dark tunnel.

That's it. Nothing very mysterious or epic. It was just me losing my way in the journey, losing the spark that would've enlightened something internal so that I could've redeemed myself from what seemed to be some train accident. But no, if there's one thing about the story I've been casted for, it is that it's no fairytale.

So, I have basically made peace with the way life molded me. I accepted who I am and tried to be as creative in my ways as I can so I could deal with it in a breathing manner. (If you know what I mean.) A lot of people have attempted to fix me, and to say that they had a hard time would be an understatement. I thank them though for even trying. But maybe, I do not need fixing. Maybe what I need is acceptance. Maybe I need understanding instead of judgment. A hug instead of an advice.

I AM A WRECK. My shattered pieces serve a purpose, and there's reason behind me being broken. What people can do about it is just shut up and fry their own fishes. 'Coz damn, I'm Phoebe Ryan, and there really is a gold in this wreckage. I don't give a flying fart if people don't see it.

To be fair, though, let me just say that perhaps, I am not beyond repair. I might just be needing the repair that takes time. 💚💙

If there's one lesson my 23rd year taught me, it is about letting go. This year, I have had to let go of so many things: books, people, my job, my ideas, and even my own thoughts. It wasn't that I wanted to let go but life always has its way of making us do it even before we are aware. It's an ice-bucket challenge of sorts; where ice represents the reality that you need to sense, to acknowledge, to figuratively get wet with.

In the recent days, prior to my birthday, I basically did not know what I'd do with my life. I was so out of energy to go on. In fact, I posted this on Facebook and everyone thought I was joking. No, wrong. I was actually joking. I hid my deepest worries through my humor. Not everyone got it like that, however. I realized though that I have a purpose. It's been there all this time and I have been refusing to accept it. That's so MYTH REID of me—all this refusal, this cynicism, this divergence. Now, I guess I have to let go of a few old parts of myself so that I will become new—and better.

There are things I'm still quite sad about, and regret is right here pulling my shirt like a wanting child. I'm letting it linger for a tad so I may be reminded about choosing better, if not the best, course of actions moving forward. I wanna be reminded of the things I have to do what's right so I will at least be given the favor to keep the most special parts of a whole that I have to set free.

Life isn't the place you find your comfort zone, it turns out. It's a place where you find which things you're willing to die for, and which risks are worth the taking. Once that's done, once you've decided which things are they, you go for them. YOU DIE FOR THEM.

I AM GETTING UP FOR LIFE. Sometimes, I will feel lazy or exhausted, but I'm definitely getting up to invite, to welcome, to love, to nurture, or to push back, to dislike, and to let go of just about anything that needs whatever, moving forward.

I am alive and I am accepting letting go as an integral part of being so. And in spite of all the things I have lost this year and the years prior, I am still grateful.

So, to whom it may concern: THANK YOU. Thank you so much.

Death is scary. The thought of it almost always makes people uneasy. Perhaps, nobody can imagine oblivion. Some of us may not be ready to see how all our loved ones move along with their lives in our absence. Perhaps, we're frightened to see what's on the other side given the manner we've been living our lives. Some of us may not be prepared to get shooed away at the heaven's gate. Perhaps, we've enjoyed life so much so that a lifetime feels no longer enough. We want more of it. We want more FROM IT because we know fully well that there is so much to it, there is so much more to the life we have been spared. So the thought of not having any sort of closure to anything related to our existence at all—the very thought of our lives coming to a stark end hardly becomes bearable.

But SCARY may not actually be the only angle there is to death. Death may be the most beautiful thing that could happen to our mortal lives.

Death is the reason some of us cling to our faith. Some of us hope for an after-life in paradise, so for as long as we are able to, we hold on to the faith that's going to take us there. We, then, do our best to be pleasing in the eyes of the gods we believe in. That is beautiful.

Death is the reason we "YOLO." Most of our life's greatest adventures materialize because we don't wanna die without trying them out. We travel. We explore. We intoxicate ourselves. We make gluttons out of ourselves. We sing. We dance. We party. We try to fail. We try and finally succeed. WE. JUST. TRY. We express. We let go of ourselves. We continue making mistakes because that's part of making the most out of this numbered life. That is beautiful.

Death is the reason we love. No matter how many times we get hurt, despite the possibility of pain, inspite the enormity of the burden, we all wish to be able to find the person we can offer our affections to, we dream for the person who will, at least, appreciate the love we have for them, we hope to meet a person with an embrace we can come home to even if it comes with a price. We love because to die without having done so is shameful and piteous. So, reciprocated or not, we love. That is beautiful.

We regret. We apologize. We forgive. We repent. We forget. We remember. We take chances. We close our eyes and breathe. We take some walks alone. We laugh together with our friends. We talk non-stop on social media. We capture every single moment because we want them immortalized. That is beautiful.

If we look closely, these things that we do don't matter because they just matter. They matter because we know what's up ahead. We've been told infinity is only for stupidity and the universe. We know forever isn't as long as we have conceived. We do what we do whatever costs, whatever risks, whatever consequences, whatever losses and lessons and life-twisting epiphanies there are to stumble upon because we have the opportunity to do them and we know these opportunities can get taken away in an instant.

Yes, at one random inadvertent look, death can be scary. But it is beautiful watching ourselves trying to do the things we wanna do with all our heart, with all our passion, with all our youth while at one hand imagining our vague end. It should somehow comfort us, however, knowing that we have seized what there was to seize before all of this life ceases.

We will end. Isn't that beautiful?

January 1

I got to welcome the New Year with my mom and my siblings at home. Since I moved to Davao City for my studies back in 2009 until I started working, this has become a rare opportunity for me. My mom even got quote emotional about it. Haha! I also got to spend time with some of my high school friends. It was pretty awesome (and awkward.) Haha

February 20

My lolo passed away. It was sad because he was the one who stood as a father to me and my sibs. The positive thing about, however, was I got to go home again and bond with everyone in the family—especially my cousins.

February  21

I joined Blue Water's #LiveToFeel movement where they printed my #LiveToExpress statement at the launch in Eastwood City Mall. I wasn't really there at the event but May 11, I received an invitation to share my story for the #LiveToFeel book. So, I wrote something very short about myself. September 28, through Blue's announcement on Facebook, I learned that my story got chosen for the compilation. October 6, I received my personal copy of the book. A dream-come-true!

Through National Bookstore, I got to finally meet the multi-hyphenate, Bianca Gonzalez. I had the chance to take a selfie with her. Yey! I was shaking too much that time so our selfie was way too blurry. Haha! Better luck next time. But it felt great to have finally met one of the people I look up to.

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on Mar 15, 2015 at 8:54am PDT

We have a better picture together but it's on print. Too lazy to get it scanned.

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on Mar 15, 2015 at 1:42am PDT

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on Mar 15, 2015 at 4:59am PDT

March 26

I attended my first fashion forum (which turned out to be my last that year. Haha. I'm really not a fashionista, that's why.) And at long last, I got to meet David Guison in the effin' flesh. David has been my blogging inspiration, fashion idol, and YAAAS—bae goal! I almost died from kilig. Imagine getting to sit right behind him and getting to smell him. Cheeses! It was surreal!

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on May 18, 2015 at 5:06am PDT

Photo from Shine. The one in off-shoulders. Rarely have my own photo. Lol!

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on Jul 29, 2016 at 9:51am PDT

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on Mar 26, 2015 at 5:18am PDT

April 17

Redge and I went to General Santos City to audition for Pinoy Big Brother. It was a crazy experience despite the fact that I failed the audition at Stage 1. Haha! Redge, however, until the third stage so we had to extend our stay for another night. It was my first time in GenSan, and I'm looking forward to coming back for some other adventure.

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on Apr 16, 2015 at 5:51pm PDT

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on Apr 16, 2015 at 3:07pm PDT

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on Apr 17, 2015 at 8:47pm PDT

April 24

I tried my luck at the PBB Auditions again—this time in Davao—and failed again. I should not give up on my dreams, should I? Ever since the show's first teem edition, I have dreamt of becoming one of Kuya's housemates. This was my 4th audition for the entire PBB history. I can't wait for more! Lol.

May 30

Team Titans celebrated April, May, and June birthdays in one party. It was also our send-off party for Sup Sawee and Clang 'coz they were leaving the team for good. It was a happy day. It only got sad when everyone had to head home. (Click THIS for the story and for more photos.)

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on May 30, 2015 at 3:16am PDT

May 31

Summer happened! I'm so glad I got to spend at least a day of the entire summer season at the beach. It's what summer is all about after all. It's just a bonus I got to spend it with some of the most fun-loving people I know.

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on May 30, 2015 at 8:38pm PDT

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on May 30, 2015 at 6:55pm PDT

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on May 31, 2015 at 8:57pm PDT

June 17

I took a two-week long social-media hiatus because I need a break from all the talking, the bragging, and the faking. My soul needed to breathe.

July 19

I turned 22 again! Haha My birthday was 18 days back but I didn't get to celebrate it on the actual day so I celebrated it my with closest friends on this day at a hotel room over boxes of pizza. It was my first to celebrate my birthday with friends so it's definitely going to be an unforgettable memory (especially because I got sick and had LBM that same day.) Tsk!

For a self-confessed FAME WHORE, this is big deal! My followers on Instagram reached 2K. One day, I'll have better posts, a better feed. One day!!!

November 8

PBB 737 Big Night. For the first time in the history of the show, I campaigned with all my strength to gather for votes for a housemate. I ended up getting so disappointed after my bet, Ylona Garcia didn't win. She was the one who really deserved it, but just like any Pinoy reality shows, the poor are always favored. So,  I'm like d'oh!

December 6

This was the day of our company's Christmas party. It was nice seeing all the people looking fab and dapper in their Hollywood-inspired outfits. It was sick to walk on stage as one of the stars of the night. Thanks to my pink coat!

A post shared by Myth Reid (@mythreid) on Dec 11, 2015 at 1:34am PST