Dear You,
The sky cries tonight, probably commiserating with my heart
as it weeps in silence. You know what? I'd like to stop the weeping. But I
trust that it will in its own time.
I don't want the rain to stop, however. Remember all those
times I needed someone to be with me as I conquered the demons inside me? I had
you. Unbeknownst to you, you have become my refuge. Now that you have decided
to burn the bridge that connected you to me—or me to you—I can only have the
rain with me.
Perhaps, it will always be this way. I will always have to
live out the confusions, and not expect for things to have clarity in the end.
But I thank you for giving me any memory at all in that little virtual space we
shared. You were so mean that I'd always imagine how your face would look like
if I'd twist your ears, or if I'd pinch you on the side. You were so SARCASTIC,
so lovably sarcastic that my heart aches even more in remembrance.
My apologies for all the times I challenged your wits. I
didn't mean to drag you into my own misery and desperation.
As they say, if people want to leave, hold the door open for
them. It's never going to console me in the least bit to recall how I tried to
keep you when you've probably always wanted to get away. I'm sorry. I didn't
mean to latch on you.
I had countless moments when I'd tell my friend and myself
I'd never bother you again, and my actions would betray me. You know that. I
bargained. I bargained because I believed I earned the prerogative to have a
soft epilogue this time. Life, as it turns out, isn't anybody's servant.
With finality, I bid you farewell, my sweet. Do know,
nonetheless, that if you need a box of pizza to feel comforted, it's gonna
come. I'll still make that happen, even then. Do know that your sarcasm remains
to be my favorite, little boy, and it is certainly going to be missed.
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